In the early 80's kid, few things were cooler than Knight Rider. How could you top crime-fighting David Hasselhoff, a synthesizer-filled theme song, and a tricked-out, talking Pontiac Firebird Trans-Am?
So, when Chrysler brought a talking car to market, what could have been better?
It turns out, a whole lot of things. Like maybe not attempting this at all.
Here's the thing...Hollywood just has to suspend disbelief. They don't have to make things actually work. Post-production is a remarkable thing. Plus, they can distract you with David Hasselhoff.
The Electronic Voice Alert (EVA) was not early artificial intelligence. It was a simple collection of synthesized voice warnings, used in place of the repetitive beeps and dings that already reminded to buckle your seatbelt, close your doors, remember your keys, etc.
To make things worse, there was no silky smooth voice actor behind it either. Instead, you had the same chip they used in the Speak & Spell repeatedly telling you your "wiper fluid is low"or "headlights are on" or "a door is ajar." (Don't worry, I had to look up that word too.)
After the novelty wore off and you showed all your friends that your car could talk, the daily experience became so awful, rumor is that drivers were removing fuses to disable the voice and were willing to go without a fuel gauge — which was on the same circuit — just to end the torture.
Chrysler even added a switch in the glove box that could turn off the EVA.
To be fair, none of this was the fault of the engineers who created the EVA. They were pushing the limits of technology. That was part of their job. Though I would love to know who decided it was a good idea to use the word "ajar" in there.
The failure was at the corporate level, allowing this feature into a product without conducting proper research. And, historically, carmakers are notorious for prioritizing profitability and engineering over customer experience.
Over the past decade or so, we have seen significant change in this space. Automakers are not known for moving quickly (sorry, not sorry) — and there are still some serious shortcomings — but they are incorporating technologies that brings with them UX designers, sound designers, and other minds that were never part of the car design process of the past.
In our next post, we'll dive into what modern carmakers are doing to improve the in-car experience, particularly the creative and purposeful use of sound, to create a more immersive and enjoyable experience.
Until then, enjoy the Knight Rider theme song. And, for pure entertainment, scroll through the eight pages of the What's New section that follows this 1982 write-up on EVA from Popular Science, when all advances of technology were truly celebrated. (Personally, I like the Jogger's Sprayer.)
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